Sunday, August 2, 2009
Chapter 12-Tell Me It's Real.
I was sitting on my couch watching a little TV when my phone alerted me to an incoming text message. I had talked with Bella earlier but it didn't go as well as I wanted. I simply wanted to make her understand that she was all I could think about but somewhere it went wrong.
Emmett and I were having a few beers talking about typical guy shit. Sports, women, guns. I was just trying to relax a little but I couldn't get her off of my mind. I had to talk to her somehow, even though Emmett was sitting right next to me.
Hey Bella. What you up to today? E
Why isn't she responding to me? Did it not go through? Did she not want to talk to me anymore? Had I crossed the line? Is she okay? It sure has been a while since I sent the text to her.
Emmett and I continued in our conversation. “You think the Falcons are gonna be any good this season?” I asked him. I hadn't kept up with football lately and I knew it would keep his mind occupied for a while.
“Well, Cuz, I think they will be decent. Did a good job last season with a rookie quarterback..” He continued talking but I tuned him out. I couldn't help thinking of Bella. Why hadn't she responded yet?
Finally, Hey Edward. Not much today. Just hanging at the pool with the girls. You still with Em? B
Whew! Maybe she hadn't written me off completely.
Yeah, just having a few beers. I just wanted to you to know I can't stop thinking about you. E
Was that being too forward? I have no idea. Never went behind someone's back like this. She needed to know the truth though.
Really? Me too. It's so weird to think of someone all day that you can't have. B
Wow! Could it be true? Was she just fucking with me? Did she really think of me all day? My pulse raced with just the thought of her thinking of me.
I know the feeling but I told you we can do this and not get caught. E
No, Edward, we can't. It's wrong. It will cause too much pain. B
Did she really believe that? I would make sure we never got caught! Anything for her.
Bella, I can promise you we would not get caught. No one will ever know. Our little secret. Just one time. E
Edward, I can't continue to debate this with you. The answer is no. Period. B
She couldn't mean that. I would have to find a way to make her see.
“Dude, what ya got going on over there? One of the chosen few hot chicks you're hooking up with?” Em asked me jokingly.
“Nah, just an old friend. Not really hooking up with anyone. I had a girl back home but we broke up right before I left and now she's trying to get me back. Between all her dramatic shit and the move, I haven't really had the energy to hook up with anyone.” I hadn't told anyone about Tanya but I figured it was time someone knew. I didn't tell Emmett at first, since we had broken up but now she was trying really hard to get me back.
Emmett didn't ask anymore questions about Tanya. He was always a good person to talk to. He didn't pry, he would always let me tell him things in my own time. I felt bad for not telling Bella about Tanya but we weren't together and she never actually asked. I wanted her so badly and couldn't take the chance on her looking for a reason to say no.
I dropped Em off a few hours ago. I didn't want him to risk driving after drinking. I only had two beers the whole time we were there but he had at least five or six. I was still trying to figure out how I could convince Bella to meet me. How I could show her that I would do anything for her; that I would never let her get caught with me. I would sneak around with her as long as she would let me. I couldn't ask her to give up her relationship for something with someone she barely knew. I couldn't ask that of her.
Can you meet me tonight? B
Oh shit! Is she serious? Is she playing with my head? I had given up hope for even speaking to me for at least the rest of the night. Of course I would meet her tonight. I'd meet her in hell if it meant I could touch her again.
Are you serious? Where? What time? E
No fucking chance I would pass this up. My heart was already beating through my chest just from the thought of her wanting to meet me. I jumped up and raced upstairs to take a quick shower and change clothes.
ASAP. You tell me where? B
ASAP! Yes!!! Where could we go? Somewhere not close to her home, somewhere nice.
Leaving in five. Hilton at the airport. E
I knew the Hilton well. It had very nice suites and the girl that worked the front desk was an old friend of mine. I called her and got her to book me in one of the suites. I gave her my debit card number and said she would have my key waiting for me at the desk.
Okay. Text you when I get there. B
I was really hoping this wasn't a joke. I've never been this excited over a girl and it would not be cool if she was just fucking with my head.
My mind was racing as I got in the car and drove to the hotel. How was she getting away from Emmett? She would obviously have to lie to him. She couldn't exactly tell him she was coming to a hotel to meet me. What had made her change her mind? Why now?
It was only a twenty minute drive to the hotel. I needed to calm the fuck down before she saw me. She would think I was fucking idiot and would turn around and go home immediately.
I was almost there when my phone alerted me again.
I'm pulling in now. B
Fuck! She's really there! I honestly expected her to back out on me. My heart jumped.
Shit you're fast. I thought you would back out on me. Glad you didn't. Just around the corner. Be there in the next ten minutes. -E
Is she as nervous as I am? I tried to relax and gather my thoughts.
Ok. I'm in the back. See you soon. -B
I pulled into the front of the hotel and walked in to meet Giana. I walked up to the desk but no one was there so I tapped the bell. Giana walked out of the door behind the desk and smiled to me and said “Hey Edward. I got your key right here. Your room number is 1711. It's a really nice suite. I think you will like it.”
“I can't thank you enough Giana.” I handed her a one hundred dollar bill for being so helpful on such short notice.
“Oh and I unlocked the back door for you. In case you want a little privacy.”
“Thanks again.” I said to her as I walked towards the front doors.
I got back in my car and drove around the back of the hotel. I spotted her car as soon as I rounded the corner. She's really fucking here! I cannot believe it!
I backed my car into the spot in front of hers. I sat inside my car for a few minutes still trying to compose myself. I needed to look calm and collected when I saw her. She must have been waiting on me to get out of the car because I didn't see her move until I opened my door. As I stepped out, I popped a piece of gum into my mouth. I wasn't going to turn around to look at her until I knew I didn't look like a fucking retard. I heard her heels hitting the concrete on her way towards me and I finally turned around and she was right there in the beautiful moonlight looking like the most amazingly beautiful sexy angel on Earth. I couldn't help but to smile at the sight of her.
She looked nervous and I didn't want her to feel that way. I wanted her to know that she would always be safe with me. I would never let anything happen to her. She finally reached me and being the shocked fucking idiot I am; all I could spit out was “You're really here!” Real eloquent.
She shrugged her shoulders and said “I know right?! Who would've thought?” Not me. That's for sure. I was sure you would never be here.
I didn't really know what to say to her so I just started walking towards the back door, hoping she would follow me. She did and she looked a little confused as to why we were heading to the back door . I told her that I had a friend that worked here. She made some joke about me having a lot of money. I just hoped she didn't think I had been here with other women.
The hotel was quiet as we walked in. We stood waiting for an elevator and I could hear her taking short breaths. I wanted to calm her down but didn't know what to say. The elevator finally arrived and I held the doors open for her to enter first. I entered behind her and pressed the button for the seventeenth floor. I stepped back against the rail and looked at her. She was so beautiful and I wanted to touch her so badly but I wanted her to be comfortable first.
The doors opened and I let her off first. She stopped after exiting, not knowing which was the room was. I pulled out the room key and pointed to our left and told her which way to go. I pressed my hand against the small of her back as we walked and I instantly felt the surge of electricity I had been missing. I asked her if she was okay. I wanted to make sure that everything was absolutely perfect. I unlocked the door to the suite for her and held the door open for her to enter.
She looked like a child as she took in the suite. I could tell she had never been in a room this nice. I walked behind her as she toured the room. I could watch her all day. Even if we weren't going to get physical tonight, I would take what I could get.
I sat down my small black bag on the dresser. I always carried this bag in my car. Never knowing when I would need soap or washcloths and I always kept a few condoms in there. Better safe than sorry. I walked over to close the curtains. I needed this to be between only us.
I turned around to look at her, I still couldn't believe she was really here with me. She was sitting on the edge of the bed and I walked over to her. I grabbed her shoulders and looked in her eyes. “What are you doing here?” She continued to stare into my eyes. Was she confused by the question? I just wanted her to tell me what made her finally come here but maybe I didn't word the question right. Stupid!
Before I could say anything else I heard her phone vibrate. I really hoped it wasn't Emmett. She would surely leave after that call. I was certain it would break the mood. I couldn't let this opportunity pass. Fate has to be on my side this time. I released her shoulders and she looked at her phone and must have ignored the call. That had to mean it wasn't Emmett. Thank you God!
I wanted tonight to be different from anything I had ever done. It already was different, I've never wanted to have sex with one of my cousins' girlfriends before. I wanted this night to be special. I may only get to have her one time and I was determined to make her see how unique she was and see just what she meant to me. She was the center of my universe and didn't even know it.
She put the phone down and looked back up at me. She took my breath with a simple look. I could tell she had never done this type of thing before. Her deep chocolate eyes looked up at me for guidance. So, I reached for her hand and pulled her up. I began rubbing small circles on the tops of her hands and I was instantly relaxed. Her touch had those types of effects on my body.
I lifted her hands to my neck and gazed into her eyes and I knew then that I had to kiss her. I had waited long enough and it was now time. I leaned down and towards her slowly. I could feel her breath on my lips as I became closer. Finally, my lips pressed into hers. She tasted like strawberries. Her lips were soft and moist. I tried to resist the urge to deepen the kiss but I had to taste her tongue. She allowed me entrance to her mouth and our tongues began to dance with each others'. My pulse raced with us being this close and her tongue in my mouth. It was the best kiss I've ever experienced. I'm not big on kissing but I would be happy if this is all I could get from her.
I had to express a small piece of it to her. She had to know. I pulled back from the kiss and gazed down at her face. I took her hands and placed them on my chest above my heart and said “Do you feel what you do to me? You make me feel like my heart is going to explode. I've never felt this way after a kiss.”
She didn't believe me but I continued to explain to her just how crazy she makes me feel. Then she finally told me that she felt the same way. I felt like I was on cloud nine; like I was invincible just by her words. I kissed her again and this kiss was much more passionate. We had put our feelings out there and now it was time to act on them.
I laid her on the bed and started to pull her shirt up. I didn't want to push her so I looked at her for approval. I wanted her to know that she could tell me no and I wouldn't pressure her. She kissed me and I knew it was okay to proceed. I massaged her breasts through her bra and even through the fabric they felt so soft and tender. I finally removed her shirt and came back in to continue our kiss. She was an amazing kisser. Did she know how good she was at it?
I wanted to look at her breasts as I massaged them. I slid her bra up and over her breasts and pulled out of the kiss. I told her how beautiful I thought they were and slid my body down so I could taste them. I massaged and licked and sucked on both of them. I could tell she was enjoying it as she arched her back and grasped the comforter. I looked up at her to see the joy I was bringing to her. Our eyes locked again and I knew she was truly enjoying this.
I've only went down on a few girls in my lifetime and I wasn't very fond of it. The girls seemed to enjoy it but it wasn't at the top of my to do list. She made me want to do it to her. I wanted her to get every bit of pleasure she could out of me. I kissed her ankles and her knees and finally made my way to her pussy. It was beautiful. It was wet, smooth, hairless and I wanted to dive in and taste if she was as sweet here as the rest of her body was. It was. It was better than any dessert I had ever tasted. I could stay down here all night.
She told me how close she was and I could feel it as she tightened her walls around my tongue. Finally, her body erupted and I drank all of it in. I kept my eyes on her as her body became flushed and shook. She was even more beautiful during her orgasm.
Her juices were covering my face but she rose up and kissed me anyways. She then pulled my shirt off and ran her hands across my chest and stomach. Her kisses felt like small fires as she placed them down the center of my abdomen. She then undid my jeans and pushed them to the ground. I knew my dick was a pretty good size but when she saw it through my boxers she looked shocked.
After she released me from my boxers she slowly began to lick the head of my dick. It felt more amazing than I thought possible. My head fell back and I knew as she licked my cock that she would slowly kill me with her mouth. She licked and sucked my cock and I managed to hold back my orgasm but when she moaned around my cock I knew I had to stop her. I wasn't ready to come yet. I needed this to last longer.
I knew then that I had to have her immediately. I laid her back on the bed and positioned myself above her. I had condoms with me but it didn't occur to me to actually use them. I wanted to feel her wrapped around me. I wanted to feel every ounce of her body. I pressed my cock into her and she didn't stop me. She felt like satin wrapped around my cock. She felt so right. Like she was the missing piece I never knew I had been missing.
I didn't close my eyes the whole time. I wanted to remember every detail of her as I made love to her. I wanted it engraved in my memory permanently. I managed to stop kissing her and kissed her cheek over to her ear. When she asked me what I was trying to do to her, I couldn't very well tell her that I was trying to make her fall in love with me. That I wanted her to feel the same as I felt.
She came again and she literally looked like an angel. I took a mental picture of that moment so I could always have it with me. I told her how beautiful she looked when she came and she seemed surprised that someone would think of her that way.
I knew I couldn't hold back my orgasm any longer when she commanded me to come. It was all I needed to finally push me over the edge.
I wanted to lay inside of her all night. She felt like home to me. I haven't felt like I had a home since my parents' died. Being here with her just felt right. I laid on my side and just took all of her in. I'm usually not such an open book when it comes to my feelings but this whole situation was different and I needed to her to know everything. “Bella, I can't even describe that. What you just did to me.”
I knew there was no possible way she could honestly feel the same way about me. She doesn't really know me. I don't really know her but I felt like I've known her for a lifetime. Then she spoke “I know. Words aren't good enough.” She was right. There were no words that could ever truly describe what had just taken place; not only between our bodies but in my soul. The electricity I felt from her touch was magnified infinitesimally. It radiated from inside of me now.
I wanted to take care of her and care for her. So, I brought her a warm rag and wiped my own come from her body. She shouldn't have to clean that off. Once I had it all wiped off, I helped her off the bed. I could see her out of the corner of my eye while we were cleaning up. Who was I kidding? I couldn't take my eyes off her if I wanted to. I teased her a bit and then I had to kiss her again. My lips were already yearning for her.
After a deep intense kiss I knew I would take her right there in the bathroom and we needed a slight rest before I chanced round two. I pulled away from her mouth and she looked hurt. I told her that she needed to get out of there before she got in trouble. I meant for her to go back to the bedroom but she must have taken it wrong. When I came out of the bathroom I saw her grab her jeans. I didn't mean for her to leave the suite. Did she really think I would tell her to leave after what just happened? I would stay here with her forever.
I explained to her what I had meant and I could tell she was embarrassed. I wanted to relax her, I only wanted her to feel love when she was with me. I laid her down on the bed with me and looked into her chocolate eyes and let me hands roam her body. It was as if I were a blind man trying to memorize every curve and inch of her body. I knew it was getting late and she would inevitably have to go home soon. I knew she couldn't stay with me all night. I felt like a greedy bastard when I asked her if I could have her again. She had already given me much more than I ever deserved from her. To my surprise she agreed.
This time was much more intense than the first time. We were both more comfortable with each other and the anxiousness was now gone. It was sheer ecstasy this time. I didn't expect her to want to ride me but sure as hell wasn't going to say no. She felt so good on top of me and I didn't even feel how quickly my orgasm was approaching. Before I could tell her to get up, I came inside of her. After the joy of my release had passed I felt so bad for not warning her. I quickly apologized to her, although I was sure she wouldn't forgive me. Why would she? I completely took advantage of her.
Amazingly, she forgave me and said she was on the pill. I was instantly relieved. The last thing we needed was a small trophy of our night together running around.
I wanted to know that this would not be a one night thing. I wanted to know for certain that I would see her again. She couldn't give me the answer I wanted. I knew she wouldn't be able to. She still needed to see what happened when she got home. She needed to see if I could deliver on my promise that we would not get caught.
Our night had finally come to an end. It was extremely late and for her sake I hoped Emmett was asleep when she got home. I didn't want her to have to explain why she was coming home so late.
I had no clue of what to say to her as we exited the hotel. I was thankful that no one was there to see us leave. I didn't want to her to feel bad about what we had done. What just happened in room 1711 was purely and utterly amazing.
I walked her to her car. This isn't exactly the safest part of town and I needed to know that she was safe. I was too involved now. I, again, was pouring my soul out to this stunning angel and somehow she was feeling the same way towards me. How could I be so lucky?
I opened her car door for her and closed it behind her. I poked my head in and went in for one last kiss. I needed to have one more before I let her go for the night. I finally had to pull away and I turned to walk to my car. I wasn't leaving until she did. Once we were on the highway I knew she would be okay to make it home.
My mind was completely boggled. I couldn't believe this night really just happened. I felt like I was going to wake up and find it was all a dream. It would be the best dream I've ever had but I would be disappointed that it wasn't real. She wasn't just in my thoughts now, she was in my heart.
I saw her pull out of the parking spot and followed behind her the whole way to the highway. There we had to go different directions. I watched her car go South and I whispered to myself “Bye my love. Good night.” I started my journey North.
Does she have any idea what she means to me? How did I let her get to me so quickly? I've never really been in love but when in the hell did I become such a fucking softie? I've always been the player; love them and leave them. Now, I couldn't think of anyone other than her. Yet, I can't tell anyone about her or what we just shared. I had to keep this secret; for her sake. I could deal with Emmett being mad at me but I could not let anyone bad mouth her.
This is going to be a tricky situation. We are going to have to always be on guard. I hope she can handle it because I can't let her go now.
I arrived home and went to lay down in my bed. My mind was still with Bella. I couldn't get her out of my head.
I was startled by the sound of my text message alert. I opened my phone to see that it was Bella letting me know she had made it home safely. I then realized I hadn't even checked my phone since I had been with her. I noticed I had new voice mail messages. I decided to go ahead and check them before I went to sleep.
As they started to play in my ear I recognized the voice. It was the same voice in all of them. Tanya. She brought me out of my bubble of ecstasy I had created with her whining into my ear. I didn't even finish the last few and just deleted them. I didn't need to hear anymore of what she said. I threw the phone across the room. There was not a snowballs chance in hell that I was calling her back tonight. I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow and let my thoughts of Bella return and carry me to sleep.